“You watch television to turn your brain off and you work on your computer when you want to turn your brain on.” — Steve Jobs, co-founder of Apple Computer and Pixar, in Macworld Magazine, February 2004

Few days back I went to pick up my friends little girl from the child care center. I was shocked watching those little young children in front of the television set, watching babies and toddlers educational TV shows. I wondered, if there’s any age limit for kids “media watching”. Are there any benefits of those satellite television shows aimed at little boys and girls? Are those “Cartoon TV Shows” or “Kids Comedy Shows” helping our kids to become “Smart kids”.Whether its a Cable TV or Satellite TV or free to air television, all of them are filled with television programming aimed at young babies to toddlers to teenagers. It does prove that there is a market for young children television and TV stations are making money. The question that still remains unresolved is “How is your child been affected by watching television?”. Consider these findings from a study conducted by the Kaiser Family Foundation:

For children under the age of 3:

More than seven in 10 (72%) of children under the age of 3 watch TV every day and nearly half of them watch videos or DVD’s every day. Most parents (95%) of these under 3 year olds who watch TV every day say they are in the same room with their child while they are watching TV either all or most of the time. 90% of all infants and toddlers have watched TV before the age of 3.

For children over the age of 3:

On average, toddlers and young children spend between 2 to 4 hours a day in front of the screen media. In most of the cases it is more than the time spent playing outside and other physical and mental activities. 99% know how to turn the Television on 85% turn on the TV by themselves 79% ask for their favorite videos and television shows Since the TV started ruling our lives there has been flood of research on how it affect us in many different aspects of our lives. In the last two decades there have been a great increase in studies on affects of watching TV on kids. In the last decade even the infants and the toddlers are getting their fair share of research, since the arrival of programming for infants and toddlers. Our busy lives make these programs our simple choice because it buys us the time to do things around the house or to have some “me time”.

Affects of TV watching for the children under the age of 3

Two-thirds of infants and toddlers watch TV an average of 2 hours a day. In 1999 the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommended that kids under 2 years old not watch any TV. Researchers at University of Washington in Seattle have carried out the study and found infants vocalize less and hear fewer words from nearby adults when the TV is on, which in turn affects their cognitive development. For the study, researchers equipped 329 infants, aged between 2 and 48 months, with lightweight recorders that captured every noise they heard in a 24-hour period. Then, a computer program determined whether each sound came from the infant, an adult or the television. The analysis showed that for every hour of television an infant is exposed to hear 770 fewer words from adults, on average a 7 per cent reduction. Infants watching TV also utter fewer “googoos” and “gagas” and interact less with adults than kids whose parents use the off switch more enthusiastically. The newborn brain is very much a work in progress. All that cognitive stimulation is critical to the underlying architecture that’s developing. Every word that babies hear, and every time they hear it, is extremely important. In fact, this finding is backed up by observations made by a team at the University of Massachusetts, which found that infants exposed to television hear 20 percent fewer words from their parents during each hour of programming they watch. Most of this infant programming and DVD’s, claiming to promote parent-child interaction, don’t really work. Best advise to all the new parents is to minimize exposure of TV during the first two years of your child. TV and other electronic media can get in the way of exploring, playing, and interacting with parents and others, which encourages learning and healthy physical and social development. Here is another two studies proving toddlers have difficulty translating the message from TV to the real life. First study is by G.L. Troseth and J.S. DeLoache. In these experiments, two-year-olds were shown videos of experimenters hiding objects in a room. Then the toddlers were allowed into the room and told to find the object. Accuracy ranged from 44 percent to 25 percent, despite the fact that there were only from four to six possible hiding places in the room. Their performance was no better than if they had simply searched the room at random, with no video to help them. Many toddlers did seem to look in the right spot after watching the first video, but if the task was repeated with a different hiding place, they simply returned to the original spot, ignoring the new video evidence. In a second experiment, the researcher hid a stuffed toy Snoopy in a separate room from the toddler, then either told the child where the toy was hidden in person, or on TV, before letting him or her into the room to search for the toy. Again, there were four possible hiding places. Once again, being told in person resulted in significantly better performance. As before, the TV-watchers got worse over time. Clearly the toddlers can understand the verbal descriptions of the objects, but somehow they don’t get the message on TV. these experiments show that toddlers don’t have true mental representations of scenes. Instead, they rely on direct experience. So while toddlers can understand what’s going on on TV, they don’t think about what they see on TV the same way older kids and adults do. They don’t connect it back to the real things they encounter in their world, so they can’t learn from TV. Whatever it is your toddler gets from watching TV, these researchers say, it’s not learning.

Affects of TV watching for the children over the age of 3

Kids between the age of 3 and 6 watch an average of about 2 hours of screen media a day, primarily TV and videos or DVD’s. Kids and teens between the age of 8 to 18 years, spend nearly 4 hours a day in front of a Television screen and almost 2 additional hours on the computer (outside of schoolwork) and playing video games. Don’t forget the time spend on watching television on the internet. As kids get older, too much screen time can interfere with activities such as being physically active, reading, doing homework, playing with friends, and spending time with family. Of course, television, in moderation, can be a good thing: Preschoolers can get help learning the alphabet on public television, grade schoolers can learn about wildlife on nature shows, and parents can keep up with current events on the evening news. No doubt that TV can be an excellent educator and entertainer. But despite its advantages, too much television can be detrimental:

Children who consistently spend more than 4 hours per day watching TV are more likely to be overweight or obese.

Kids who watch violent acts are more likely to show aggressive behavior but also fear that the world is scary and that something bad will happen to them.

TV characters often show risky behaviors, such as smoking and drinking, and also reinforce gender-role and racial stereotypes.

That’s why it’s so important for you to monitor the content of TV programming and set viewing limits to ensure that your kids don’t spend too much time watching TV.

Teaching Good TV Habits

Here are some practical ways to make TV-viewing more productive in your home:

Limit the number of TV-watching hours:

Stock the room in which you have your TV with plenty of other non-screen entertainment (books, kids’ magazines, toys, puzzles, board games, etc.) to encourage kids to do something other than watch the tube.

Keep TVs out of bedrooms.

Turn the TV off during meals.

Don’t allow kids to watch TV while doing homework.

Television is a privilege:

Treat TV as a privilege. Watching TV has to be earned its not a right. Establish and enforce family TV viewing rules, such as TV is allowed only after chores and homework are completed.

Try a weekday ban:

Schoolwork, sports activities, and job responsibilities make it tough to find extra family time during the week. Record weekday shows or save TV time for weekends and you’ll have more family togetherness time to spend on meals, games, physical activity, and reading during the week.

Set a good example by limiting your own TV viewing:

Check the TV listings and program reviews ahead of time for programs your family can watch together (i.e., developmentally appropriate and nonviolent programs that reinforce your family’s values). Choose shows that foster interest and learning in hobbies and education (reading, science, etc.).

Preview programs before your kids watch them:

Come up with a family TV schedule that you all agree upon each week. Then, post the schedule in a visible area (e.g., on the refrigerator) so that everyone knows which programs are OK to watch and when. And make sure to turn off the TV when the “scheduled” program is over instead of channel surfing.

Watch TV together:

If you can’t sit through the whole program, at least watch the first few minutes to assess the tone and appropriateness, then check in throughout the show. Talk to kids about what they see on TV and share your own beliefs and values. If something you don’t approve of appears on the screen, you can turn off the TV, then use the opportunity to ask thought-provoking questions such as, “Do you think it was OK?”  Talk to other parents about their TV-watching policies and kid-friendly programs they’d recommend.

Offer fun alternatives to television:

If your kids want to watch TV but you want to turn off the tube, suggest that you all play a board game, start a game of hide and seek, play outside, read, work on crafts or hobbies, or listen and dance to music. The possibilities for fun without the tube are endless — so turn off the TV and enjoy the quality time together.

Some resources to check out:

Kaiser Family Foundation’s report on children watching tv
Cognitive Daily: Are toddlers incapable of learning from TV?

How important are manners and etiquette’s in this modern world and child development? Most of the good schools require kids to have proper child manners and child etiquette’s. “Military Schools” and “Private Schools” are very strict about this and most of them have extra classes to teach kids proper manners and etiquette’s. Not only that there are etiquette schools, etiquette classes and even etiquette consultants to teach, train and arm our kids as well as the adults with modern manners and classic etiquette’s.

Children are reflections of their parents. On special occasion’s, gatherings, parties or visiting friends and relatives parents expect their children to show proper manners and etiquette’s, be polite and respectful. Manners and etiquette’s cant be learn overnight its a gradual process and needs a lot of time and patience from the parents. Teachers as well as senior adults have noticed and raised the voice that, children now a days show very little respect and manners than previous generations. Parents manners and etiquette’s help develop childrens manners and childrens etiquette’s. When teaching child manners, do not overload a child with many lessons at once, deal with one or two at a time so that they can grasp it in full detail. Do not ever tell them “Do it because I say so.”, you have to explain them “Why it’s not right?”, What will be the benefits of doing the right things?”. Please don’t forget to praise them for doing the right thing, it will be just like, if you work very hard at your job and not being praised or rewarded for it.

Etiquette training starts at an early age, kids learn by observing things and behavior of people around them. Parents discipline and parents manners will set the right examples, you are the one who is their first influence, first learning example. If you talk with mouth full of food, they will notice that and assume its right to do so. Family manners and etiquette’s are all those little things that we do everyday, around kids at home or outside. If the parents do not force the family manners and follow them themselves it will make a big difference later in the kids life. Rules should be equal for everyone in the house, than only kids will respect you and each other.

The way they behave is the way they are treated. Remember the magic word “REWARD”, its the key to teaching manners to young kids. Reward doesn’t have to be financial or a gift. Reward can be your love to them, may be just a hug and a kiss, praising them for what they did, may be taking them along for a bike ride or shopping, may be allowing them to go and play with their friends. In the end for every good deed they need to be rewarded to understand the importance of doing the right things.

Parent’s role in teaching child manners

As I said before, kids learn by watching adults around them. Parents manners and family etiquettes, therefore play a huge role in teaching child manners and etiquette’s.

Respect:

Your parenting style has a lot to do with respect. Treating children with respect teaches kids to respect others and you. Talk kindly to your children and they will learn how to talk kindly to others and you. It is also helpful to talk to children regarding how to respond in specific situations to better prepare them for when these situations arise.

Sharing:

Share with your kids so they can understand the importance of sharing with others. Compliment them when you see them sharing with others.

Politeness:

Everyone in the family must practice “please” and “thank-you” policy in which, for example, no request is considered unless the person asking says “please.” When one of your children forgets, just say “Where are the magic words?”. They soon catch on. You can teach them to say “thank you” in the same manner.

Apologizing:

In the begining children are always shy to apologise, but before the age they become stubborn to apologise parents should encourage children to apologize, when they do something wrong. Apologies should be sincere. If they are not comfortable apologizing face to face, they should write an apology note. Good judgment should be used by the parent as to when an apology is appropriate.

Compliment:

Emphasize the right thing to do and compliment your children when they exhibit good manners, rather than criticizing them for using poor manners. Praise is a wonderful teacher. Tell your children how proud you are when you notice them being polite.

Model the manners:

Remember your child is watching you every moment and will learn to do everything that you are doing, so watch out for your own actions.

Instruct in small doses:

Teach manners in a step by step process. For example, telephone manners or telephone etiquettes, begin instructions with “hellos” and “good-byes,” then teach asking the caller to “please wait, I will go and get my mum” and in the end , guide children to take messages. Dining etiquettes or table manners are another important learning task. Try in small step by step process as well, for instance begin with how to sit properly on the table, to how to hold cutlery and in the end teach them how to set up the dinner table and serve the guests.Try step by step process with other manners as well.

Keep kids healthy:

Children tend to show bad manners or mis manners and etiquettes when they’re tired or hungry. Kids need proper sleep and nutritious foods to survive. If you think you will be having late night at the family gathering, make sure your kids have an afternoon nap to cope with the late night stress instead of misbehaving.

Be patient:

Don’t expect perfection overnight. As with any skill being taught, there will be mistakes along the way. Learning is a trial and error process. We all learn from our mistakes. Give your kids enough time and opportunity to learn and grasp new skills. As I said before young children or teen kids they are the reflections of their parents. As a parent we all want to give them the best, but sometimes we are not fully equipped with all the information. If you feel you are stuck with some questions feel free to take “parenting advice”. There are many “Child Care Services” that help young parents with free Parenting Advice.

Have a happy parenting.

Forcing kids to study and do their homework is a very conflicting topic. Even though we know education is paramount for their survival in this modern world. Conflict arises with the questions, “How much homework and studies at home is not too much?”, “Are they getting enough time to relax and rejuvenate their bodies?”. There will be many of you who may have written on the blogs or in your personal diaries hidden somewhere down the earth in a little lunch box, how you felt when your parents forced you to study. How much you hated the school and how much you hated your parents?. This will be the story of most of the people who have been to the school. As kids we made lots of friends at school and than we wanted to do the best things that kids love to do, PLAY. Parents got angry at us for not doing our homework, not getting good grades at school and as a result parents forcing us to study hard to get better grades. The list goes on to show that anger, that we felt towards our parents or teachers for forcing us to study.

Now all of you are educated and smart people, sitting in front of your PC or laptop and reading this article after doing a lot of digging on the internet on this topic. I am not saying that forcing kids to study is right, neither I am denying it. Only thing I want you all to ask yourselves is, no matter how much you hated your parents and schools and so on, Will you be what you are today, if they didn’t force you to study? Some of you may be feeling very angry with me right now because you may have been forced too much. Sincerely I feel sorry for you and I am sure as parents you will rectify those things that you didn’t like in your childhood. Many of you will agree that your parents gave you the right direction and helped you by forcing studies, because at that tender stage you didn’t know what was right for you.

Like I have said many times before, As parents we want to give everything that we didn’t get as kids, whether its education, toys, comfort or even time. Trust me that was exactly the same, what your parents were thinking at that time. They were not your enemies and you will not be enemies of your kids either but your kids will say the same things to you as well. Every new generation comes up with new ideas, new methods of doing everything in better and different ways and the best part is they do succeed in doing so. What we forget is underneath every strong building is a very strong foundation. That forcing of studies does finally pay off.

For us to be better parents and have smarter kids, the question is, How much should we force our kids to study. We have to set up the limits to not to stress the kids and not to hate us as parents. You don’t want to be in a situation when your child is sitting in front of the books all day and learning nothing. Kids are given enough homework at school. In almost every country the education departments, child welfare agencies, parents and teachers have had this discussion, how much homework should the child get and how much time should they spend after school in studies. The purpose of homework is to help children consolidate what was taught that day in the class. A pretty good argument, but is this homework so much that it doesn’t give your kids any time to play and relax and causing burn out. Same amount of homework for one child can be 20 minutes and may be an hour for another.

As parents we have to sit down with our kids and see how are they doing with their homework, if they can finish it within an acceptable period of time than don’t force them to study. If they are taking longer than may be they are not understanding the concept or they are simply not interested in it. This is when they need help and may be little bit of forcing. If you force your kids too much they will not learn anything. They will miss out on their playing time and as a protest they will choose not to learn anything knowingly because in their brain its their fun time that’s been spoiled by the homework. There is no textbook solution to this problem, every child is different and has different capacity of understanding the concept and grasping the knowledge. Forcing alone will not help the child, making the topic easy, interpreting it in a different way will help the child in understanding and keeping their interest. Soon your child will start thinking of these hard topics in a different way with your help. Key is spending time with them and helping them with studies. For the long term goal, it is more important that your child understands the concept in a practical way rather than just doing their homework for the sake of it. Practical way is the one that stays with us forever, books and subjects are forgotten with time.


Forcing studies becomes necessary only when your child does not have any interest in studies for whatever reason. Even in this case it is advisable to talk to the teachers or get some outside help, rather than forcing it is more important to know why your child is not showing interest in studies. Try reasoning with them to find out the problem. Its very simple if somebody force us to do something, we don’t like to do it either unless we know and understand the valid reason for it.

Little bit of force is necessary as kids brain is still developing and needs proper nurturing to go on the right path in the future. If you don’t help them and show them the right path, everything they do will be right for them which can be a dangerous situation. If you force them too much than they may rebel and hate school, hate studies and more important hate you. Make sure your kids are not overloaded with homework from school and have enough time to play and relax to rejuvenate their brain and body.

Have fun with your kids. Understand them and avoid forcing the studies. Being friends with them will help you understand their attitude. You can also try using some of the free online teaching tools for studies at home.

Do you want to search more on related articles?

Custom Search

Do you nag your kids for studies, cleaning the house, doing the dishes, behaving properly, putting their toys away and the nagging list goes on? Nag or not to nag kids is a big question doing rounds for a very long time. Every few years some study come up in the support of the other. Just last week a study of 3450 students from Sydney university, published in Teachers College Record, a US journal, came up with the conclusion that nagging does work. Every child gets influenced by two factors in life, first one is parents and teachers and the second one is their friends and role models. Influence of parents and teachers has a significant impact on a kids academic life while friends and peers has a big say in their social and emotional well being.

Now the question arises how much nagging is necessary? Lets go back a generation and ask how much nagging did your parents do? Did that nagging help you in what you are today? Some of you may not agree with their nagging. Just like the studies conducted in the different countries do not agree with each other on the topic. As parents all we want for our kids is to give them the best, give them everything that we didn’t get ourselves when we were kids. Therefore we have to set up a limit to nagging and strike a balance so that the child gets the best out of it and does not stress out.

Lets start with the reality, nagging does work and I completely agree with the study of Sydney university researcher Andrew Martin. “Parents and teachers who might feel powerless during adolescence have a bigger influence on academic motivation than they think – sometimes up to three times the impact of peers”, Martin said. But I have to add, it works only if done in a right way. For example take all those advertisements that are targeted towards our kids, during kids programming on the television. These companies have spent a lot of money on the research to get that one advertisement right. That advert goes straight to their head and they want to have that product, its the result of their continuous nagging and hitting the right spot with the kids. That’s right, if we want our kids to listen to us and do as we say we have to come up with the strategy that they learn, nothing comes for free. For example, if they finish their homework they can go out and play with their friends. You may have to nag few times but than they know unless they have finished their homework they can not do what they want. Same can apply to kids cleaning their room, helping you in the house and everything else. Remember kids have a lot of energy and lots of activities to do, so through nagging you can work around in a way that they get what they want within limits and you get what’s best for them. Magic rule “Do not make FALSE promises, STICK to whatever you have PROMISED”. These are innocent kids and if you play with their innocence they will never forget it and you will be in their bad books and soon they will stop listening to you.

Sometimes make the exceptions when they are really nice to you and they are rushing around to get everything done because something really important to them is happening or about to happen. They will really appreciate that and forget all the nagging you do. Take some time out to sit down with them and try to explain them why do you have to nag, try to explain to them what are the importance of things that they do. This way your nagging will work without stressing the child out. My personal experience tells me that nagging is very important in the early childhood, after that kids learn if they do this than they will get to do that. If they can create an interest in the studies in the early childhood that means less nagging from you when they are growing up.

Here’s a really cool game for all the parents. Get a calender. There are 365 days a year. Say every day has a value of 25 cents. Tell your kids you will mark the calender if they have been good or bad. The number of days they have been good will be equivalent to the amount of 25 cents that they have earned for their Christmas presents or their Birthday presents. Do not forget to total up at the end of each month, so the kids know how much they have earned. It will be a great motivation for them because the can see what they are earning for being good. Have fun.

I will soon post an article about the influence of friends on your child.

Need more help on this article.

Custom Search

Eventhough brain development starts early in the pregenancy but its only partially developed at birth. Billions of nerve cells or neurons are developed prior to birth but they are not connected. The development of a person’s brain happens most rapidly during the first three years of life as neural connections are developed between these neurons. Development of these connections, dictate a person’s intelligence. Neural connections are formed by looking, listening and feeling activities. Early experiences can have a dramatic impact on the brain’s wiring process causing the final number of connections in the brain to increase or decrease by as much as 25%. The activity that most effectively develops neural connections is direct interaction between adults and children and children and children through play. Direct interaction helps in developing all four major learning domains,Cognitive, Social, Personal and Imaginal. Everyday can be a day full of learning opportunities for children if parents and caregivers seize opportunities in the routine to teach lessons. Everyday routines such as bathing, dressing, meal preparation, eating, cleaning, sorting laundry and making beds can be a great activity and learning experiences for kids.